I used to believe that everyone wanted something from me simply because everyone has their own selfish desires. But then I realized it’s unfair to say that everyone you know or meet is a selfish person. Because what if everyone isn’t selfish? And okay, everyone has their own selfish desires, but what if… those desires would benefit your well-being or happiness. Wouldn’t the two cancel each other out? Making them a trusting selfless person…
So now, I’m more open minded to trusting someone… anyone to a certain degree. Most people would probably consider that a fault in me or maybe even a weakness. But in our nation, everyone is entitled to the presumption of innocence. Which basically means that someone is considered innocent until proven guilty. And I think… I think the same thing goes for trust. Shouldn’t everyone have the right to a minimal level of granted trust? How can you build a trust barrier between you and someone you just met? (Unless it’s a creepy stranger, then you’re okay)
That being said, I’m tired hearing people say “It ain’t nothing to cut that b_tch off,” “No new friends,” or simply saying no new anyone. When did we become so antisocial? And why are people feeling this constant need to be negative? I would call this pessimistic behavior, but then it could be argued that a pessimist is an optimist with experience—and I don’t feel like dealing with that bull shit. I get it. You have trust issues.
And I can’t say I haven’t been because I have… I’ve had trust issues that stemmed from guys with girlfriends who attempt to talk to me. I’ve had trust issues because I’ve been used, the lack of communication, stories that don’t add up, the subtle tone in their change of voice when asking a serious question. It’s unfortunate that the amount of times it has happened to me got to the point of frequent paranoia—turned me into a cray cray chick! It was so bad that anything I was told, I doubted. I pretty much had the basic mentality along the lines of “Yeah. You may talk to me, make me laugh and say the sweetest things. But how many other girls are you doing that to?”
But, how can you blame me? How you blame anyone for thinking something different? How can you blame anyone for getting mad at you for not replying to a text (at some point) when every time they see you, your phone is always in your hand? Or whenever you’re out with them, you’re on you’re phone (rude as hell btw). Some of y’all need to see where these unable to trust people are coming from. Ask yourself are you REALLY busy? Or did you give the person the expectation that you’re phone is always in your hand? Other the other hand also you have people, myself included, who can sit their phone down and reply 3 hours later. Because honestly, you don’t want to be too eager or thirsty unless you’re having that type of conversation where you’re going back and forth. Maybe it is just me, but I really don’t be going hard like that for the text messages even though my phone is always nearby. If anything, me not texting you back is helping me from you potentially boring me because 24/7 back forth gets old really fast especially when you do it everyday/every other day. Like damn canyagirlgetsomespace?!
But anyways… “trust issues” ……….
You mean to tell me that there’s not one person… ONE… nadie en su vida that you can trust?! I’ve noticed that majority of the people who claim to be cutting someone off rarely faces the actual problem at hand. Instead they take the easy route that I mentioned in a previous blog, Are You Always This Childish? I’ve also noticed that the people being cut off hardly ever notices or even cares. Regardless of the “cut off-ee” acknowledging this behavior, people still keep to themselves with their trust issues…
So even though I understand the logical side to this, I wonder if we’re shortchanging ourselves when we practice this “no new friends plus I’m cutting this person off” motto. We’re beginning to treat our relationships like positions to be filled, instead of the blessing they can be whenever they may happen and with whomever they happen. If you’re good on friends, be thankful for them and keep it moving, but don’t intentionally keep the door closed on potential connections that can add value to your life.
I was taught that trust is vital in life. Everyone needs to surround themselves with trustworthy people and to be a trustworthy person their self. Trust is a key component in any healthy relationship whether it be with friends or family or your boyfriend/girlfriend. Without it, you can’t be yourself with someone therefore, you cannot be really close. Without trust it’s merely impossible to understand or be understood. If someone doesn’t understand you, you’ll won’t be able to feel that they care. Basically what I’m getting is… Without trust, there’s nothing. Similar to love, trust never returns to you void.